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Sunday, January 9, 2011

All about me

Hi, my name is Marie and I am overweight! Phew I'm glad that is over with.

I have been chubby all of my life well since I was 12. I've never eaten well but not awful either. I never took the time to think about what I was actually eating even though I loved food and even went to cooking school for awhile. I just wanted to eat what I wanted. I thought my weight was at an all time high when I got married to my wonderful husband, Philip who also struggles with weight. But is still adorable. don't you agree?

But I was soon to find out my weight hit an all time high when I was pregnant with my first child, Enzo. I craved McDonald's Big Mac's and gave into that craving whenever possible.



I soon realized that this was unhealthy for the baby and began eating healthier. I found that the foods were actually pretty good and that over time I began wanting the healthy food more than the unhealthy food.  I began on a journey of correcting my eating habits which has had its ups and downs in the last three years, mostly downs since I couldn't get over the weight factor. I would go great for like two weeks, feel great and start to enjoy the food when I'd see some ice cream and eat like a quart, feel awful about it, and end up eating whatever I wanted. I then got pregnant with Cooper and actually lost weight, only to put it back on again when I was breastfeeding because everything but turkey sandwiches and chocolate made him have an upset stomach. [Both my boys had really bad GERD (a reflux disease), luckily they grew out of it. ]
So I decided to go at it from a different angle, I began training for a half marathon here in Atlanta. I got the shoes, the treadmill, and the ipod. I ran everyday for months, and even got up to 8 miles but was not losing any weight. However my diet was not fantastic as always.  But I was getting in shape contrary to what my head was telling me. This was me in June of 2010 in the middle of my training.


I sprained my ankle, and lost hope of ever getting to that half marathon.  I lost all hope in myself. It was a really bad time for me. I gained back some weight, not believing your worth it can do that to you. (Although, I have to admit I haven't known what my real weight is in years. I'm terrified of the scale. ) This is about what I looked like then and now. (And yes I could potentially be the worst picture taker ever. I always look away at the last moment or make a crazy face, so on.)
But one day I just woke up and said I don't care anymore. I decided I was going to work out and finish that half marathon and if I don't lose weight who cares, I'm beautiful just the way I am. I started my regular work outs back up again. And I'm working, on eating healthy, trying more whole grains, finding ways to fix that sweet tooth, and finding healthier options for cheese, hamburgers, and fries, (my three worst cravings).  I try a little more every day, making changes, replacing one food with another. Is it easy? No, especially with a three year old, who only likes hamburgers and fruit, and a one year old who eats like horse making me think am I eating enough?. But I've found that through time I will be able to eat healthier, that I will adjust my life to my new lifestyle, and lose a few pounds here and there. Will I be a size 2? Doubtful! Will I lose 3.5 lbs a week as is medically suggested? Also, doubtful! But will I be healthier and happier? YES! And I've found that that is what matters, not my weight or waist size.  And if I really want some ice cream, my game plan is to first try some yogurt or fruit. If I still want it in a couple of days then  I'm gonna have it but in proportion and then I won't feel so guilty for having it. Or want it so bad that I eat like a half gallon. So here I am WORKING towards a better, healthier me, care to join me?

5 comments:

Tina @ Faith Fitness Fun said...

Yay! You changed the comments.

And yes - you are BEAUTIFUL! And funny. And kind. And helpful. And a million other wonderful things. :)

Princess said...

Hello Marie!

Thank you so much for leaving the very first official comment on my new blog! I was SO surprised to see a comment made by someone that wasn't a family member *lol*.

I look forward to getting to know you. :)

Marie said...

Thanks Tina for all the awesome comments.

Your Welcome Princess. I figure we can all use as much support as possible. and thanks for being the first official non-family member to write on my blog as well.

EGB said...

Hi Marie!
I wish you the best of luck on your journey! I'm currently trying to break my sweet tooth, so I feel your pain. I can't eat dairy while I'm breastfeeding because my little one is allergic, and that's what made me decide to try to stop cold turkey with all sweets. (Since most are dairy based). I've been finding myself having elaborate fantasies about milkshakes. I'm sure you'll get to a good, balanced place!
Emily

Marie said...

Thanks Emily! I love milkshakes as well, and it doesn't it make it worse when you can't have it at all! I'm two weeks into my four weeks without and then I can have one a week. I have to admit though I snuck in a chocolate truffle last night. Philip has them laying on the counter and I walk by them every time I enter the kitchen and I just couldn't resist anymore.